revival

The first line is written last:

Its been down so god damn long..that it seems like up to me...
Its my blog I am talking about..yes its been down with me..I have been down..well my internet connection has. And If I was so bright spirited and full of lust I would tell you all about it. Unfortunatley, maybe fortunate for you however, I am not..so I´ll just drop it...or on the other hand..I have nothing else to write..and i need to refresh my english writing skills..So I´ll tell you anyway, bored or not bored
For a month and a week I have been living in my new apartment without an iNternet connection..And as many of you think, It is not that bad. Even the Internet being a very neccesary utility, it is not life threating to be without, not like cigarettes or coffee..The bigger shock is I am also without television—yes..I mean theres a limit to how spartanian your living conditions can get isn’t there?

It´s all about needs, superficial and imagined needs. Needs that I can do without. As my new black plastic container called a modem arrived in the mail today I felt happier than I had in a long time...and all of a sudden, as a domino brick had fallen and released a chain effect of superficial buying needs.,my psyche started playing games with me..convncing me I needed a TV aswell..a new one,,flat screen 32 inches. Indeed. Also i decided to add a digital camera to the shopping list. What stopped me? Well it wasn’t only the fact that I realized my savings account is periodically locked for “harder times”..NO not the fact that my liquidity sucks being a student and all nor the fact that the recently received internet connection was being really slow and pissing me off in more than one way..preventing me from klicking the green “BUY” Button on the webpage where i was to make my purchase.

My head was saying, You need a TV now! But I never trusted the logic reasoning of my head..as It always turns out to be unlogic..or not en route with my heart and stomach. So I decided, against my own best I assume, that I do not need a TV and a camera after all..Good for me.

What I really need??


I just need to go to Tibet, shave my head and learn how to levitate..

And maybe I´ll write a book..

Ill call it "Makitalos guide to levitation"

But first..I have to walk the road down the hill...I cannot skip ahead of things..

First, career, money, consumption oh sweet consumption, diapers and new cars every 5 years, and a DOG, do not forget, and a house..yes? one in the country side not far from a bigger city, to have the best of both worlds..you know..FIRST things first. Do not get ahead of things. First I must WIN- and FAIL. And then it is legitimate for me to go join that Chic buddist and his boys..whats his name..?

(authors note: Hannas sudden impulse to pick up blogging again..has nothing to do with her recently received Internet connection)In her own words: “I admit this aint agood way to have a come back. I left my audience (even if youre still the only one reading CGP)with promises..and then signs of despair and destruction of a heart..and blab la bla..I admit its not a good way to return to blogging if youre not planning on starting a whole new blog..and I wouldn’t do that..again. But who cares..who cares what happened to my heart or anyone elses? Just get on with it..”